There is always going to be friction in a relationship. Why? Because there are no perfect relationships. It’s normal to have disagreements and differences. However as couples learn to love one another, the number of disagreements they encounter should be less and less.
I have been married to my wife, Marisol, for 34 years, and although there have been several challenges, we have a great relationship. We have learned how to be married by intentionally prioritizing our family, having mentors, watching other couples, going out with couples we admire, and attending church. Plus we learn from books on the topic of marriage.
Anyone can get married, but it takes work if you want a good marriage. If you want a great marriage, that's going to cost you - you'll need to invest in your relationship. That’s why there’s no need to try to figure things out on your own.
Be wise and learn from others. Get help from those who have already been through where you are at today. If your marriage and family are important to you, there’s no reason to stay stuck.
“This is my rule of married life: it’s better to be happy than to be right.”
I am often asked for book recommendations on marriage, so I put together a list of ten books I have read and highly recommend to all married couples. Read as many as you can, but don’t rush the process. Enjoy the journey.
Set a goal to read several marriage books each year. If you do, you will be much more prepared for the most exciting and beautiful yet terrifying and startling adventure of a lifetime called marriage.
Here’s my top ten list of marriage books.
If you purchase any of the books using the links below, I receive a tiny commission from Amazon so buy as many as you can to help support the coffee needed to write these midnight blog posts.
- The Bible. The world’s best seller of all time. Any version of the Bible will change your life for eternity. I prefer the E.S.V. Study Bible.
- Every Man’s Marriage (2010). An Every Man’s Guide to Winning the Heart of a Woman by Stephen Arterburn. Or Every Woman’s Marriage (2010). Igniting the Joy and Passion You Both Desire by Shannon Ethridge.
- Marriage on the Rocks (2019). A Comprehensive Guide to a Solid, Healthy, and Lasting Marriage by Jimmy Evans.
- The Five Love Languages (2015). The Secret to Love That Lasts. Start with this one if you’re not sure which book to get.
- The Love Dare (2013). A 40-day challenge for husbands and wives to understand and practice unconditional love
- Intended for Pleasure (2010). Sex Technique and Sexual Fulfillment in Christian Marriage by Ed M.D. Wheat, Gaye Wheat
- Love & Respect (2004) The Love She Most Desires; The Respect He Desperately Needs by Emerson Eggerichs
- Boundaries in Marriage (2009). Healthy boundaries are the property lines that define and protect you and your spouse as individuals by Henry Cloud and John Townsend.
- Relationship Goals (2020). How to Win at Dating, Marriage, and Sex by Michael Todd
- Courageous! Prayer Journal for Men (2021). Refresh your Spirit, Recharge your Mind, and Revitalize your Faith. I am the author of this book. No, it’s not a marriage book, but it is a relationship book. If you can get your relationship with God right, you are well on your way to a better marriage.
Here are a few more books:
- The Four Laws of Love: Guaranteed Success for Every Married Couple by Jimmy Evans (2020). There is also an optional discussion guide for couples & groups.
- 7-Day Prayer Challenge – How to Pray with Your Spouse to Create Spiritual Intimacy. This is the second book I wrote. Praying together is the most intimate activity you can do with your spouse. Learn how to pray 1-minute prayers with step-by-step instructions to connect deeper with each other and God, minimize conflict, and create spiritual intimacy.